Why does sperm comes out every time I talk to my girlfriend or when I am romantic? I'm only 16 years old. Is everything normal with me?
Abhimanyu (age 16)
I believe you are confusing things. What you are noticing is the pre-ejaculation fluid coming out of your penis, which in slang terms is sometimes called pre-cum. When you are feeling romantic, whether talking on the telephone or even just holding hands with your girlfriend, your body doesn't know if those romantic feelings are going to lead to sexual intercourse or not. Obviously it should not until you are married, but your body doesn't know that. All it notices is that your are sexually aroused.
A number of things happen inside your body in response to sexual arousal. Your heart rate rises a bit and your blood pressure goes up. This leads to your penis getting bigger and depending on the amount of arousal, it will get erect. At the same time, preparations are made for the possibility of an ejaculation. Two glands called the Cowper's glands, begin producing a clear fluid that begins to drip out of the end of your penis. The purpose of this fluid is to push any possible remaining urine out of your penis. Urine is acidic and can kill sperm, so the body clears the pathway. If you feel the fluid, it is very slick. As it drips out of the end of the penis, it coats the end of your penis (the glans) to make it a bit easier to have sexual intercourse. That slickness also coats the inside of your urethra (the tube in your penis, so that when ejaculation occurs the semen has an easier time being shot out.
So what you are noticing is the pre-ejaculate fluid. Depending on the person and how aroused you get, you can end up with a small spot on your pants or a large wet spot. The production of the pre-ejaculate fluid is not one of those things you can control.
Semen, which is whitish or a bit yellowish in color, comes when you have an orgasm and ejaculate. Orgasm requires more than just talk to cause it to happen. It requires physical touching and stroking of certain parts of your body. But this type of touch should only take place between a husband and wife.
Semen contains a lot of sperm (the cells that can make a woman pregnant). Pre-ejaculate fluid can contain a few sperm. However, it only takes one sperm reaching a woman's egg to cause pregnancy. Also, because the pre-ejaculate fluid is from your body, it can spread sexually transmitted diseases if you had picked up one from sinning in the past. This is why boys should not fool around with the genitals of a woman to whom they are not married. Even without ejaculation there is a small chance of getting her pregnant, and a much higher chance of spreading a sexually transmitted disease.