The Boys' Growing Up in the Lord

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Question

Hey Jeff!

I am 20 and just recently came to a huge revelation about my life. I stopped smoking marijuana and realized that I gave into pornography too often, which lead to frequent masturbation. I also grew close to the Lord in the time of my marijuana use as I began reading the good book and had experiences in that time, but as soon as the high came off, I would get super anxious and I realized that weed was bad for me. My struggle has been to regain my stability and reach faith. I have been in faith now after getting over my fear of losing my erections. This fear developed, I think, because I stopped masturbating and giving into porn, but honestly my mind doesn't know. It's just this constant thought of "What if I don't get them?" even if I were to be having one at the time. It was ridiculous. I used to pride myself on the strength of my mind, but recently I was devastated and felt mentally sick. I worked on my over sensitivity throughout this all as well as my over analyzing mind at the same time. I am now at terms with the fact that it is because I over glorified the actual intercourse over love which lead to my madness, and accepted that God made us wonderfully. If there's any help I'd appreciate it.

PS. I want to thank you for a comment you posted on someone else's problem. What you said really spoke to me. I feel God used your words to give my thirsty mind some fresh water. Thank you.


Answer

I take it that it has only been a short while since you stopped smoking marijuana. I'm noticed that most of the drugs people use "cure" the very symptoms the drugs cause. Marijuana gives the user the illusion of being relaxed and uncaring, but its withdrawal symptoms include anxiety, which typically drives the user back to smoking. Thus, it becomes a self-feeding cycle.

The bad thing about marijuana is that it hides in the body's fat cells so the withdrawal is drawn out. The worse withdrawals are during the first month, but it takes a good six months to get back to a semblance of normal thinking. And even then there will be periods cravings that will strike you at odd times. If you realize this in advance, it will be easier to ride these problems out without turning to drugs.

Marijuana clearly doesn't affect your erections or your ability to have sex once you are married. However, it does damage your sperm. Your fertility may be less until your body recovers from the damage you have done to it.

Pornography also has an addictive cycle. It corrupts it viewer's thoughts about sex while at the same time convincing the person that he can't get sexually aroused without looking at pornography. Looking at pornography causes the person to see sex as just something done. The person it is done with is just an object. There is no caring about another person.

At the core of both drugs and pornography are lies that the user is convinced must be true. "But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death. Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren" (James 1:14-16). Notice the last statement. The way to battle sin is to realize that you are being lied to.

Thank you for your response sir! Would it be wise to conclude from the Bible that we as human beings are sexual throughout our lives?

Humans are sexual from puberty to death. We are not sexual during childhood.