The Boys' Growing Up in the Lord

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Question

Hi

I've met a girl of my dreams. It's been two months. We didn't even plan on falling in love initially, it just happened. There's so much I can say about our similarities, missing each other, our daily chats and outings, the way we feel and make each other feel. We spoke to both our parents and even planned marriage. I know it sounds far fetched but it was like we knew each other all our lives. We referred to each other as soul mates. It was perfect.

Then overnight she changed. She has become cold and told me she was fasting for an answer from God for direction, and He replied "I'm not the one for her."

How can this be when my love is pure, and I know I won't do anything to hurt her or bring unhappiness to her life? She is Christian and I'm a Hindu.

Religion for me is love and respect all. We are all God's children. Religion should not break bonds. We spoke about religion before and she was fine that neither of us change and we respect each others beliefs and support each other.

And now this. She is head strong and blind now. She treats me as if I'm just by the way.

Please help I don't want to lose her. I love her.


Answer

One of the reasons we date before marriage is to get to know that true person. It is easy to put on a front for a while, but eventually the acting collapses and we see the true person. It is also for this reason that sex is not to take place before marriage because you can't be certain that a person will stay with you until they are willing to enter a marriage vow with you.

While you were deeply in love, the person you loved was the girl you imagined that she would be. You didn't really love her as she was because you did not yet know her all that well.

While she blamed her change on God, she was lying. The Bible clearly states that God no longer directly speaks with people. "Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away" (I Corinthians 13:8). The Word of God (the Bible) is complete and there is no longer any need for the partial gifts that existed while the Bible was being written. Therefore, those who tell me they have a direct message from God are also telling me that they are either lying to me or lying to themselves. The truth is that she changed her mind, but she didn't want to accept responsibility, so she blamed it on God.

I tell people that marrying someone of another religion is difficult at best. Sure, it is easy for the two of you to ignore each others beliefs and worship the way you prefer, but eventually you will have children and typically that is when the fights break out. In which religion are the children going to be raised. After all Hinduism and Christianity are not compatible. Hindus see God as just one of many gods. Christians understand there is no God except the one God. To Christians the Hindu gods are merely figments of men's imaginations and the work of their hands. The Christian's God is creator of all, including men and cannot be relegated to a particular form. This strong contrast would confuse your children with the most probable result being that they would not believe in any god.

I know it is hard, but you can't make her marry you. Neither of you would be happy even if you could. You learned more about her and it wasn't good. It there was something good that came out of this, it is that you learned this before you committed the rest of your life to her.