The Boys' Growing Up in the Lord

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Question

By the grace of God, I am a Christian. I have an issue similar to the one you addressed earlier. The girl, whom I sensed to be for me to marry by the will of God, came to my place and in the process of sinful play, I removed my penis and put in between her lap, with her underwear on, and ejaculated there.

Now she is claiming not to have seen her period when it was due, though the whole mess was just about three weeks ago. If it turns out to be true that she is pregnant, what should I do? I love this girl and she loves me too. I have cried to God for mercy and have taken steps to avoid this ugly and ungodly closeness before this news came. What should I do? 


Answer

There are a number of problems which must be addressed. You got involved in lewd behavior, if not outright fornication. "Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in strife and jealousy.  But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts" (Romans 13:13-14). But not only that, you hint that you believed God put you in this situation and because of that you felt justified in taking out your penis. "Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am being tempted by God"; for God cannot be tempted by evil, and He Himself does not tempt anyone" (James 1:13). It is God who consistently states that sex belongs only in marriage and that includes the acts that lead up to intercourse. "Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman" (I Corinthians 7:1). Therefore, let's be clear and honest: You are in this situation because you followed the lusts of your flesh in disobedience to God.

From what I understand, you had your penis pressed against her genitals when you ejaculated. She still had her underwear on, but cloth is not a complete barrier to your sperm . Since she was also sexually aroused, it would mean that her vulva would have been opened with unimpeded access to her vagina. Your sperm swim and could easily swim up her vagina to her uterus. It only takes a few minutes to make the journey. If you actually had your penis in her vagina, even if you did not ejaculate while it was in the vagina, you can still leave sperm in the vagina because your pre-ejaculate fluid can contain sperm. Thus, It is distinctly possible that you got her pregnant.

When it gets to be two weeks passed when she should have had a period, she can take a pregnancy test to confirm her suspicion.

What I strongly suggest is that the two of you decide if you wish to get married and then not delay if the answer is "yes." "But if they do not have self-control, let them marry; for it is better to marry than to burn with passion" (I Corinthians 7:9).