The Boys' Growing Up in the Lord

Share this page with your friends

Bookmark and Share

Question

Hi,

I have a question for you. I am 15 years old and never masturbated before, but I heard what pre-cum is and I am wondering if that is a sin.

Once or twice, in my life, I will have an erection and lay on my stomach for a little bit. When I get up there is a little bit of liquid, but I don't know if that is pre-cum or not. Also, one time I had an erection and was laying on my back doing nothing and I felt like something came out, like pre-cum, but I don't think anything came out. This happened while I wasn't watching, and I never have watched, anything that could be called a pornographic photo or video. But in this incidence I was looking at an app that doesn't have pornography on it. The videos that are just supposed to be funny, but I saw a girl. I didn't see any sort of liquid on my pants or anywhere surrounding it. I am thinking that I just had a feeling where something came out, but nothing actually did. I am wondering if that is a sin. If it is, what should I do so God and Jesus will forgive me?

Thank you


Answer

God designed the male body such that when you get aroused, the body goes through a sequence of steps to get prepared for sex. These sequences are automatic; that is, they happen without conscious thought. You know you are not going to have sex -- there isn't even a girl in the room -- but your body's systems still respond. The cause can vary. It can because you thought about something sexual, even briefly. It might be that your seminal vesicles are getting full, which raises your sexual urges. Of course, far too many guys chase after the feeling and watch pornography to stimulate arousal.

The earliest noticeable reaction to arousal is that your penis enlarges and stiffens. As arousal continues or increases, the Cowper's glands start producing a lubricating fluid which in sufficient quantities will drip from your penis. This fluid is somewhat thick and clear. With strong arousal you will eventually have a orgasm and semen will squirt from your penis.

The physical response is neither right nor wrong. It is just how the body operates. What makes a situation right or wrong is what you are doing at the time. Paul explains this:

"For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God; and that no man transgress and defraud his brother in the matter because the Lord is the avenger in all these things, just as we also told you before and solemnly warned you. For God has not called us for the purpose of impurity, but in sanctification" (I Thessalonians 4:3-7).

It is God's will that each Christian be sanctified; that is, set aside for a holy purpose. Therefore, a Christian cannot be involved in having sex without being married because that is unholy (Hebrews 13:4). In order for you not to get involved in sex before marriage, you have to have self-control. But this means you have stay away from passionate things that excite lust in you, such as pornography.

Therefore, it is a chain of progression. Lust (a strong desire to commit sin) is wrong (Matthew 5:28). In part, it is wrong because it will eventually lead to a breakdown of your self-control and involvement in lewd behavior (Romans 13:13-14). Lewd or sensual behavior will eventually lead to you having sex with someone you are not married to.

Satan wants us to sin, so he offers what we desire with a trap -- we would have to sin to get it (James 1:14-15). The desire itself is not wrong. These are normal and what is built into each one of us. Neither is the temptation wrong. Even Jesus was tempted and he lived a life without sin. It is when a person lusts for sin -- strongly wanting to commit sin, even though he hasn't yet acted on it -- that he begun to be wrong.

What you are describing about yourself is simply your body reacting with sexual desire. I'm guessing that you haven't had an ejaculation of semen yet, but you are getting close to it happening. When you are getting aroused, your Cowper's glands are starting to operate and drip. The second experience was likely what is called a "dry orgasm." That is when your system went through the process of ejaculating but you are not yet producing semen, so there is nothing to ejaculate. None of these are indications that you did something wrong. What you do need to be careful about is that Satan will use the pleasant feelings of these things to tempt you to do something wrong, such as look at pornography.

Hi,

I am still a little concerned that I don't know if semen actually came out or not in the first instance. I didn't mean for it to come out, and I didn't want it to come out, if it did. I just don't know how to tell the difference between the lubricate substance or semen itself. I had heard that you can't ejaculate without knowing after I looked up the answer to this question. I just don't fully know what happened.

If this is a sin what should I do to ask for forgiveness from God?

Thank you

Whether semen or pre-ejaculate fluid came out, it doesn't change my answer. Your body is working as designed. Both of these fluids are supposed to come out. From your description, you weren't doing anything sinful.

When a male ejaculates semen, about one to two teaspoons of liquid comes out. Right before it comes out, you'll experience a brief but intense feeling of pleasure. Semen is thick and whitish-yellow in color. It contains a high amount of sugars, so if allowed to dry, it will leave a stiff spot on your clothes. However, it takes hours for it to dry.

Pre-ejaculate is also thick, but it is transparent. It is mostly water. It dries rapidly and doesn't leave much of trace.

My guess as to what is happening is that your body is getting close to being able to ejaculate. Your seminal vesicles are starting to produce semen and your body is responding to the signals that it is time for an ejaculation. Probably within the next week, perhaps as long as a month, you are going to ejaculate. Most likely it will happen in bed as you start to fall asleep or wake up. These ejaculations are called wet dreams. There is nothing sinful about it. It is just the way your body was made by God.