The Girls' Growing Up in the Lord

Share this page with your friends

Bookmark and Share

Question

Sometimes when my boyfriend and I kiss my vagina becomes wet, I know that this happens when you are sexually aroused but does that mean we are going to far? We have decided to wait until marriage before having sex but we want to make sure we are staying pure in God's eyes. Is this normal?

Answer

Your body responses by instinct to various simulations. A loud noise will make you jump away from the source of the noise. A hot surface will make you pull away from the source of the heat. The smell of good food being cooked makes your mouth water. All of these are automatic responses.

When your body responds to sexual stimulation, it is means that you should take note and be on your alert. It means conditions are right for you to respond sexually even though it is not the appropriate behavior at that time. It is especially important to pay attention because generally people who are sexually aroused do not reason well. The part of their mind that makes reasoned judgments shuts down. "With her enticing speech she caused him to yield, with her flattering lips she seduced him. Immediately he went after her, as an ox goes to the slaughter, or as a fool to the correction of the stocks, till an arrow struck his liver. As a bird hastens to the snare, he did not know it would cost his life" (Proverbs 7:21-23).

That is why you find in Song of Solomon, the young woman giving warnings.

"He brought me to the banqueting house, and his banner over me was love. Sustain me with cakes of raisins, refresh me with apples, for I am lovesick. His left hand is under my head, and his right hand embraces me. I charge you, O daughters of Jerusalem, by the gazelles or by the does of the field, do not stir up nor awaken love until it pleases" (Song of Solomon 2:4-7).

When she found herself getting too passionate, she would step back and warn herself and others that the relationship was moving too fast. Love needs time to develop. It should not be rushed by physical responses. So don't seek out stirring up your passion. When you realize that you are aroused, step back for a breather so that it doesn't go too far. I can guarantee that if you are feeling passionate, your boyfriend is struggling with the same feelings. Hence, you both should be on your guard.