Question:
At my school, the kids act very badly. The girls are twerking and the boys are making dirty jokes among other things. I can’t find any person who is fit to be my friend. I feel bad because I feel like I am judging them even though I cannot. What should I do?
Answer:
Of course, you are making judgments. You cannot decide who you would like to be friends with without making judgments. Everyone makes judgments. What is forbidden is making unrighteous judgments. “Do not judge according to appearance, but judge with righteous judgment” (John 7:24).
When the crowd is behaving badly, look for the people who are unpopular. People have this tendency to look down on anyone who is different. I remember being picked on when I was in school because I refused to behave badly, so I didn’t fit in with the crowd. I’m sure it has gotten worse over the years, but there are always the smart kids, the shy kids, and the gentle kids out on the sidelines. Those are the people you make an effort to get to know. Not all will be good. Only some will become friends, but they exist.
Also, don’t limit yourself to just your school. Get to know the kids at church. Join a club for something you are interested in. The more people you meet, the more likely you’ll find a good friend.