I don’t know why I’m doing these things

Last updated on October 8, 2020

Question:

Please, I have been battling something and, worse, she isn’t my girlfriend. She is a choir leader and I’m an usher, but I’ve been spending nights at her place. Last night I handled her breasts. They were so nice, and she just allowed it. I still question myself as to why I am doing all these things. I think I may need more of your counsel. I want to stop all of this. I don’t think I even love the girl. Worse, she is five years older than me. Please help me.

Answer:

I’m trying to figure out why you are playing with fire. Despite her claim of being a Christian, she is actively trying to seduce you. A man should never be spending the night at the house of a woman he is not married to. She has already got you sinning by getting you to sexually touch her. “Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman” (I Corinthians 7:1).  If you continue to be with her, she will continue to push for further sins until she has your clothes off and having sex with her. If you wish to live a godly life, you need to stay far away from her because she knows if she gets you sexually aroused enough, you will stop thinking and do things you will later regret.

For the lips of an adulteress drip honey And smoother than oil is her speech;  but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword.  Her feet go down to death, her steps take hold of Sheol.  She does not ponder the path of life; her ways are unstable, she does not know it.

“Now then, my sons, listen to me and do not depart from the words of my mouth.  Keep your way far from her and do not go near the door of her house, or you will give your vigor to others and your years to the cruel one” (Proverbs 5:3-9).