Last updated on June 10, 2022
Question:
Hello,
I am a 13-year-old boy. I have a couple of questions for you.
I have had a fast-increasing sex drive and have really wanted to masturbate for a while now, but I have stopped myself from doing so because I know the church really values chastity. I have to admit I did masturbate once because I couldn’t take it anymore and I don’t think I can hold off for much longer. I was wondering: Does masturbating break chastity? I researched this and I found that a lot of people thought it did if you did it with porn (which I have no interest in), but I couldn’t find an answer about doing it without porn. I really want to stay chaste so if masturbating is bad then do you have any other solutions for this? I feel like it’s getting impossible not to masturbate. Even if it did break chastity, would it be a big deal if I did masturbate once or twice a week?
Thanks and God bless.
Answer:
Chastity means to refrain from sexual acts with another person before marriage. Masturbation only involves yourself and therefore, it doesn’t affect whether you have been chaste or not.
Guys who watch pornography typically masturbate while viewing the sexual scenes or do so shortly thereafter. There is a tendency among people to blame physical action instead of the actual spiritual problem. Pornography is wrong because it is designed to make people lust over having sex without being married. “For this is the will of God, your sanctification; that is, that you abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in lustful passion, like the Gentiles who do not know God” (I Thessalonians 4:3-5). It is that lust that is the problem.
However, relieving yourself because you need to ejaculate is not condemned in the Scriptures even though ejaculating by yourself is mentioned a few times in the Scriptures. See Is masturbation sinful or not?
Response:
Thanks!