Last updated on August 17, 2020
Question:
This girl and I were together for about two weeks until I found out she had chlamydia. I never removed my undies nor shorts, although there was touching. There was no penis to vagina touching or anything like that, only the hands we used. But I’m worried it still could be passed on to me. I fingered her and I touched myself. I’m just worried if it could have transferred this way. Please help.
Answer
Chlamydia can be transmitted from one person to another by intercourse or by oral or anal sex through the contact of body fluids. Thus, by putting your fingers in her vagina, you would some of her vaginal fluids on your hand, touching vulnerable areas shortly afterward, such as rubbing your eyes or nose, or touching your penis could transmit the disease.
What is particularly dangerous about chlamydia is that about half of the men who catch it have no symptoms — at least not until the disease causes significant damage to the body. Chlamydia is detectable about 1 to 3 weeks after exposure, so you should see a doctor and tell him that you were exposed to the disease. If you do have symptoms, they would include a burning sensation or pain when urinating, an unusual discharge from your penis, swollen scrotum, tender testicles, or a fever.
The problem is that you are like a little boy playing at the edge of a cliff and thinking you’re perfectly safe because you haven’t fallen over the edge yet. What you and this girl were doing is called foreplay. It is the early part of sex that gets the body ready for intercourse. While you didn’t put your penis where it didn’t belong, you had begun to engage in sex — you just didn’t finish what you had started. And just because you didn’t finish, it doesn’t mean you did not sin.
Fondling another person’s genitals is not proper behavior between unmarried couples. At a minimum, it causes you to have thoughts about having sex with a person to whom you are not married The only difference between thinking about sex and doing it is the opportunity. “But I tell you that everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart” (Matthew 5:28). But what usually happens is that you go further and further with each encounter, justifying it by thinking that nothing bad has happened in the past, so it won’t happen if you do it again or go further. The only thing that stopped you this time was that you learned she had a sexually transmitted disease. How far would you have gone if you hadn’t found out?
And what kind of girl is she and what kind of guy are you that you would let a relative stranger (you only were going together for two weeks) to put her hands on your genitals? Where would you expect this to lead?
And then consider this question: is this the type of girl you want to marry? After all, you know she has been engaged in having sex with multiple other guys. Is she the type of woman you would trust and commit your life to? I hope you are sensible enough to say, “No way.” Then why were you considering having sex with such a girl and potentially tying your life to hers?
That is the nature of sin. It lures you deeper into sin until you are suddenly startled to realize how far you had gone. A warning shot has come across your bow. Are you going to clean up your life and start living like a Christian, or are you going to ignore the warning?