Last updated on August 20, 2020
Question:
I would like to move on in life and not worry about my hypospadias anymore. Do I share it with a friend or talk to a girlfriend about it? I can’t be shy of my own body anymore. Please advise me, how do I move closer to girls and have the courage and just be myself?
Answer:
Hypospadias is where the opening for the urethra is not at the tip of the penis, as it is in most men. Instead, the opening is further back along the tube due to a birth defect. There are different types of hypospadias, depending on how far the opening is from the correct position.
The illustration above shows the various regions:
Glandular: This is the most common form, where the opening in on the glans, but just below the end. It is considered mild enough not to require surgery to repair. It does not impact life in any way.
Coronal: Is a bit farther down, near the corona of the glans (where it flares out). Glandular and Coronal Hypospadias account for 70% of all hypospadias.
Penile: Is when there is an opening along the shaft of the penis.
Scrotal: Is when there is an opening through the scrotum.
Openings far from the normal point can be corrected with surgery.
Talking about personal body parts and functions is a poor topic of conversation for general acquaintances. “And those members of the body which we think to be less honorable, on these we bestow greater honor; and our unpresentable parts have greater modesty, but our presentable parts have no need. But God composed the body, having given greater honor to that part which lacks it” (I Corinthians 12:23-24). Consider it only if there is a need to know.
How severe of a case do you have? Where, exactly, is the opening currently? If it is only a mild case where the opening is just slightly below the typical place, no one is going to notice and you won’t need to mention it to anyone. If I recall correctly, you said before that you had not noticed the problem until a doctor happened to mention it. The only person you might eventually talk about it to is your wife and in mild cases, even she won’t notice.
Girlfriends won’t notice and won’t care because you should be following God’s teaching and not being naked in front of girls. Your hypospadias has no impact on your ability to get to know women of your age. There is no need to be self-conscience about things others don’t normally see.