Last updated on September 22, 2020
Question:
One day I was looking at a little porn, then I ask God for forgiveness. Then I think I was tempted to do it again and again, but I’m saved — born again. Am I going to hell? If I am, can you show me how to place my name back in the book of life and help me to not do it again because every time I do it, it feels as though something is really wrong? I don’t feel right.
Answer:
Looking at pornography is wrong. “For this is the will of God, your sanctification: that you should abstain from sexual immorality; that each of you should know how to possess his own vessel in sanctification and honor, not in passion of lust, like the Gentiles who do not know God” (I Thessalonians 4:3-5). It warps how you see women and your views of sex. See: Lies Pornography Tells Men.
It isn’t the temptation that is a problem — all people are tempted. “No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it” (I Corinthians 10:13). The real problem is that you give in to temptation and sin.
The first thing that you need to do is make a sincere effort not to look at pornography ever again. Even if you fail, you need to be so determined that you won’t give up but will continue to work to no look at pornography. This also means you must honestly look at yourself and decide why pornography has such an appeal to you. Is it boredom? A desire to ejaculate but you are deceived into thinking you can’t without looking at porn? Or something else entirely.
Along with your personal determination to change, God requires that you apologize to Him for your sins. “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (I John 1:9).
Most young men tie pornography so tightly to ejaculating, they think to quit pornography by no longer ejaculating. Such always fails because the male body requires ejaculating periodically. The correct way is to find a way to manage the body’s need to ejaculate that does not involve sinful lusts like pornography.
Question:
I gave up porn and now I’m praying more and reading daily my Bible than before. Thanks, man, I appreciate it. You were like a prophet warning me about some danger.
Answer:
I’m glad to hear you are improving. If you ever want to talk again in the future, you know where to find me.