How do I get rid of my jealousy?

Last updated on August 25, 2020


I kind of like this girl, and every time I see a particular person with her, I get kind of mad because I have a feeling that he is going to take her away. How do I get rid of my jealousy?


Jealousy is the strong desire to hold on to what is yours. It can be used in a good way, such as when God declares, “for you shall worship no other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God” (Exodus 34:14). We all belong to God (Ezekiel 18:4), so God has the right to want to hold on to us.

But you are correct that what you are feeling about this girl isn’t proper because she doesn’t belong to you — not when you describe the relationship as “I kind of like this girl.” Perhaps one day it might develop into something more, but for right now she is trying to decide what kind of boy she wants in her life while you are deciding what kind of girl you want in your life. No guy can “take her away” since she has her own mind. She might decide that another guy is a better match for her than you, but that will because she made that choice. She might be right or she might be wrong but it remains her choice. Just as you will decide whether she or some other girl is more suitable for you. It isn’t proper to be jealous of someone another guy since this is a part of the process of eventually deciding who you want to marry.