I have trouble urinating when other people are around me

Last updated on October 7, 2020

Question:

I have trouble urinating when other people are around me, especially with my buddy. What should I do?

Answer:

Nervousness or sexual arousal can make it difficult to urinate. There is a forked path inside your prostate gland. One path leads to the bladder and the other to the ejaculatory duct. When you are not aroused, the path to the bladder is open and the path to the ejaculatory duct is closed — sort of like a switch on a train track. This keeps urine from back flowing into your ejaculatory duct. When you are aroused, the opposite happens: the path to the bladder is closed and the path to the ejaculatory duct is open. This keeps semen from being squirted up into your bladder.

The problem comes when you are aroused and wanting to pee, the wrong path is opened. Being nervous can cause the muscles to tense and switch the openings. Take some deep breaths, focus on relaxing, and block out thoughts of where you are or who is around you. With a bit of patience, the paths will switch back and you’ll be able to pee. With enough practice, it will become second nature to you.

Question:

You said I should relax when I’m trying to pee. In fact, I searched on the Internet a few years ago and I knew I should relax when I’m peeing. But the harder I tried, the more difficult it is to pee. I always feel as if someone is standing behind me and my brain becomes totally blank. This terrible situation has lasted for a long time. So, would you tell me more ways to solve this problem? Or how to relax as if nobody is around? I’m sorry to take up your valuable time, but this problem affects me a lot.

I’m looking forward to your reply. Thank you.

Answer:

The problem is a learned response and the only way I know to overcome it is practice. Typically you trigger the problem and then with patience work through the particular issue. Therefore, in this case, you would have a trusted adult or friend stand nearby while you use the toilet. Just stay there until you actually are able to pee. Sometimes running water in the sink will trigger the reflect. Repeatedly practice until you no longer have the problem.