Last updated on October 18, 2021
Is texting with my girlfriend about her breasts a sin?
I’m going to make a guess that the reason for these discussions is that you find the topic sexually arousing. “But immorality or any impurity or greed must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints; and there must be no filthiness and silly talk, or coarse jesting, which are not fitting, but rather giving of thanks. For this you know with certainty, that no immoral or impure person or covetous man, who is an idolater, has an inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience” (Ephesians 5:3-6). Your discussions would fall under the category of “filthiness.” Today, we call it “dirty talk.”
Test your motivation. How would you feel if you know another guy was having a similar conversation with her? Would you be upset with her and him? And just why would you say it is wrong for another guy to say such things, but it is alright for you to say them?
Thank you. If talking is wrong, is doing also wrong?
I assume that by “doing” you mean touching her breasts. “Now concerning the things about which you wrote, it is good for a man not to touch a woman” (I Corinthians 7:1).
A woman’s breasts have a large number of nerves that are connected to her sexual response. Touching her breasts has a similar impact on her as someone touching your inside thighs. When you are touching somone to arouse sexual desire in them, it also impacts you as well. Such behavior is called “lewdness” or “sensuality” in the Bible. It is acting like animals — doing things simply because it feels good. “Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in strife and jealousy. But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts” (Romans 13:13-14).
Having a girlfriend is not about having a person who can make you crazy with sexual desire. A girlfriend should be someone you are considering as a possible wife in the future. Because of the potential of living with her for the rest of your life, you should be treating her with respect and not using her to get yourself aroused.
I am glad to see your replies! Thank you so much!
I touched her two times and I am now regretting that I did it. But what do you think about kissing? I think it is not bad.
I hope to receive more advice from you on how I can have a holy relationship with her.