Question:
Dear Pastor,
I just read what seems to be a common question: “How far can you go with your girlfriend in regard to intimacy?” I remember discussing that when I was dating back in high school and college nearly 50 years ago. I’m not sure where I got the idea from back then, but I was clear to myself and my many girlfriends: “My penis is for me and my wife. Not for you.” So, I never entertained the thought of petting or anything of that nature. Two girlfriends tricked me into swimming in their backyard pools, lying that their parents would be home. Both wanted to see my penis. Nope. I left both times because it was my penis that was for me and my wife.
I’m also pretty sure that because I was taught early that masturbating was very important for young men and me in particular, to channel my sex drive, I wasn’t looking for my girlfriends to give me sexual relief. I enjoyed being with the female and being in charge of our relationship and dates.
Also, owning my penis like I have has protected me from extramarital sex. It was critical since I had some significant temptations over our 40+ years of marriage.
These are the things I taught our sons and other young men over the years. Tomorrow night, I’ll be teaching it to a couple of 18-year-old young men who are very strong Christians. These two are amazingly eager to learn how to rule their male sexuality, channeling it toward their future wives.
I thought I would mention how I viewed my penis concerning girlfriends and women who have come onto me after I got married, as it pertained to the question. I hope it helps.
I appreciate what you do.
Answer:
I’m glad this site has helped confirm that you have made the right choices. It is even better to hear that you share the wisdom you’ve gained with the next generations.